Type O Negative - Slow, Deep And Hard

Ohhh Fuuuuuck!! This is a turn up for the books, who would have thought? Type O Negative finally make their debut appearance on `Themes’ and what a way to kick off the weekend on a Thursday Evening!! We should all be grateful that I don’t own any Carnivore (well, maybe except this) because I don’t wish to melt any of your delicate computer speakers (well, maybe not today…tomorrow is Friday after all) before Foetus Fridays’ offering. What more could you wish for?

Slow, Deep and Hard could be considered somewhat of an autobiographical concept album. It chronicles vocalist/bassist/songwriter/gargantuan front-man Peter Steele's corroded state of mind after a past girlfriend cheated on him, resulting in a nasty breakup and later a suicide attempt. Lucky for us, after this failed attempt of taking his life, Pete was a new man, yet his anger lingered. Rather than trying to end his life again, he channelled his anger into musical form. Carnivore was done and now he had something to really be mad about, rather than the silly politically incorrect rage found on his Carnivore offerings. This album, song-by-song, further delves into the inner machinations of a broken man and his deep dark desires after the traumatic event of a partner's infidelity. Album opener "Unsuccessfully Coping with the Natural Beauty of Infidelity" details the first chapter of this dive into depravity as the lyrics describe Pete catching his girlfriend cheating and his racing mind as he berates her for being such a whore and detailing his shattered trust. This may sound dark, and it is, but it is not without Pete's (and the rest of the Drab Four) classic dark humour, as these seething verses are interrupted by a minute-long moaning sample, finally brought to an end by Pete's woeful scream. Even the chorus itself is amusing, with a repeated chant of "I know you're fucking someone else" followed each and every time by a background chant, affirming this revelation. "Unsuccessfully Coping..." is the longest song on the album and it does a perfect job of introducing the general tone for the album - the darkest possible real-world subject matter brought to you in the form of silly lyrics and over-the-top graphic depictions of these events occurring.

All in all, this album is a fantastic start for one of the best and most unique bands to ever grace the metal genre, yet it simply does not showcase the band's signature and classic sound. This "false start" as well as the fact that there are only five actual songs on the album (not counting the two noise interludes and the bonus cover) is what makes me drop this masterpiece down a mere 20 points from a perfect score. While this album, stylistically speaking, is much gnarlier and heavier than what the band would later achieve mainstream success with (Bloody Kisses and October Rust, namely) it shows true potential for uniqueness, a potential that was met with ease and stride.

Ripped kicking and screaming from an album that’s 34 years old to MP3 @ 320kbps

Type O Negative; Slow, Deep And Hard

1.       Unsuccessfully Coping With The Natural Beauty Of Infidelity

2.       Der Untermensch

3.       Xero Tolerance

4.       Prelude To Agony

5.       Glass Walls Of Limbo [Dance Mix]

6.       Misinterpretation Of Silence And Its Disastrous Consequences

7.       Gravitational Constant